Rhonda, from Kansas (submitted Jan, 2004)

Name: Rhonda
Home state or country: Kansas


My husband and I started dating about 7 years ago. He was fully aware of the fact that I had 3 children from a previous marriage but he didn't mind.  My children hated him because he had long hair, smoked, and partied.  They would not even talk to him when he came over.  I fell for him.  Why?  I guess God had a plan for us then but we did not know it.  I found out two months after we started dating that I was pregnant.  This totally devastated me.  He was so excited.  I would not even tell my kids till I was too far along to cover it up.  We finally got married but we were not going to church.  Things were rough even though he tried to do things with my kids.  I did not like him getting on to my kids and we brought a lot of garbage into our marriage from our past.  We thought we could make things better by conforming to the world and being like our neighbors but we have found that not to be true. 

In the last 8 months we finally have changed churches, rededicated our lives to the Lord, and gave up having to be like our neighbors.  We've begun telling our children it is okay to have a stepdad and stepmom and to treat them with respect and dignity.  My husband and I now both agree on discipline issues and we have agreed that that if it is the Lord's will on something then that is how it will be done.  We have also made a committment to get out of debt in the year 2004 so we will have a brighter future for our children and to teach them the values of family, christian morals and ethics, and not to be materialistic when you are trying to please your children. 

We still have a long way to go because I still have issues with my ex that I am working on but I pray everyday that these resentment feelings will eventually go away.  My favorite verse is Proverbs 18:10,  "The Lord is a strong tower, the righteous runneth to it and are safe."  I do have a husband now who is very much in love with the Lord and who also loves my children as if they were his own.  I know that the Lord has great plans for my family now that we decided to let him do the leading.

God bless all of you.